Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Reasons that Yesterday Sucked

1. I had to do my taxes. In a mad rush. Four days before that well-known deadline of April 15th. Because I'm a procrastinator.

2. And I didn't know until after I did them that they didn't have to be postmarked until April 17th. If I would've known that, I probably would've waited even LONGER. So it's probably for the best that I thought I'd have to get 'em in the mail by Friday.

3. I drove to Wendy's for their Southwest Taco Salad (Which I loooove) and, during my lovely, spring afternoon drive, I was cut off by three people. Please understand that I live in a town that consists mainly of two-lane roads: One lane going my way, one lane going the other way. But, from time to time, (three times, in fact) the road expands to let people out of Wal Mart, Staples and Lowe's, hence giving us two lanes to work with. For all of about four car-lengths. Oftentimes, there is no one coming out of those stores, so that extra lane just sort of sits there, unused. A few assholes see this as their opportunity to get one goddamn car ahead, because that's really gonna cut down their commute time. The first time, the driver was a teenager, so I just sort of shrugged and said "Kids. What'cha gonna do?" The second time, it was an adult, and it kind of pissed me off. I'm very much of the Wait Your Turn mentality, so it frustrates me when someone just has to get in front of me. If you're passing me - or anyone else, for that matter - on a two lane road, that's fine. Fair enough. Par for the course. Yadda, yadda, yadda. But to use a lane that's not really a lane to go 42 mph as opposed to my already-disobeying-the-fifty-billion-posted-35 mph-speed-limit-signs 41, and, oh yeah, I can't go any faster because there are other people ahead of me is just much to Asshole-ish for me. The third time it happened, it was an old lady in a Mercury. I'm sorry, but when I am made to feel like I'm going too slow for someone who can barely see over her steering wheel, I feel disgusted. Like I'm holding her up or something. Please. I've been stuck behind her geriatric brethren on one lane, no passing roads, going 15 below the speed limit on numerous occasions, and I stayed right where I was. How dare she pass me?

4. Wendy's forgot to give me a fork. Do you know how ridiculous it is to make me pull around and go inside for a fucking fork? That should've been included without so much as a thought because I got a fucking salad? How do you forget that? It is not the first time this has happened to me, and it infuriates me. Plus, I'm lazy. And that meant I'd have to get out of my car to go inside and ask for a fork. But, trust me, if I could, I'd totally just pull around the drive through a second time for that thing. I'm that unmotivated.

5. There was a line in Wendy's. It was a big night for dining out in Milford, apparently. (I noticed some of my fellow residents even put on their good flannel and camouflage for the evening. Not me, though. I wasn't counting on getting out of my car.) Anyway, there was this huge line, and the forks at the little condiment/necessities kiosk were all gone, so I had to go to the counter. And this always presents a dilemma for me. Because part of me wants to wait in line because, hey, I know what it feels like when someone just jumps right to the front because their thing is "easy" or whatever. But the other part of me thinks "Hey, no way. I waited in line and I got screwed. Which means I have to wait in line twice? Uh-uh." So I thought about it for a sec, then, despite the slight twinge of guilt I felt, I just walked up to the nearest pre-pubescent cashier to ask for the utensils they cheated me out of. And, wouldn't you know it, some "lady" (and I use that term very loosely) said "What? You ain't gotta wait in line like everybody else?" No, ma'am, I ain't gotta. Because I'm young and still have all of my teeth. And that, my friend, gives me a free pass. Which is what I wish I would've said. But I didn't, of course. Instead, I got all nervous and apologetic (I hate confrontation with strangers) and explained - very quietly, I might add - that I already ordered through the drive thru and just needed a fork. I'm an idiot.

6. I think waaaaaaay too far into things.

7. My roommate/landlord called to tell me our house sold. Which means I am now, technically, homeless.*

8. I ate that Wendy's salad only to get home and find out there were freshly grilled, homemade hamburgers waiting there. D'oh!

9. I went to bed too late. I'm tired today. Hence the lame list.

*This may not be so true. An event that occurred since I woke up this morning, but before I left for work, may have drastically improved the way I feel about Item #7. Post to follow. Later. After I figure out if Billy's sincere invitation to move in with him, I mean really move in with him, was truly an invitation, or something he accidentally blurted out in his Day Off half-awake/half-still-asleep/not-quite-alert-or-conscious state. Stay tuned.


melish said...

He wouldn't have said it if he didn't mean it Laurie. :)

Chip said...

No thinking guy says that off-the-cuff. My guess is he put a good bit of thought into it before he mentioned it, and therefore wants it to happen.