Friday, July 14, 2006

Ramble On, Laurie. Ramble On.

1. I am addicted to Vitaminwater. I mean, seriously. I bought $20 worth of the stuff at the IGA today. I drink roughly three to four bottles of it on a daily basis, and I'm wondering if it's really that beneficial to my health. Is it okay to drink that much? Can you have too much Vitamin C, B3, B6, B12, B5, Zinc and Chromium? Because I am such a sucker for this stuff.

Defense, Vitaminwater's Raspberry-Apple drink, says it aids in wound heeling. Should I be drinking this non-stop after my surgery? Will it really help me, or am I exactly the gullible idiot this company is after? I realize that whatever excess vitamin C you take in, you just pee out. But I take Centrum daily, AND Vitamin C tablets. AND I drink water and tea supposedly infused with MORE vitamins. Could I be doing myself more harm than good? Or am I doing nothing at all?

I can rationalize my addiction because this water, even though it has carbs and sugar, has got to be better than the liter or so of Dr. Pepper I used to drink on a daily basis, right?

Less than a half of my purchase today.

2. I finally updated the blogs on the right there. Finally, the ones with dead links have been updated. Seriously, it was driving even ME crazy. So Serra and Kristi, I'm finally linked to your proper blogs. And I have some new ones over there. FINALLY. I have seriously been meaning to do that for weeks.

3. I went through my pre-op paperwork today (it was in my purse), and I just realized that I can't wear MAKEUP OR NAIL POLISH during my surgery. Are they TRYING TO KILL ME? Seriously, I thought it was bad when I couldn't eat for 12 hours, but that's doable. Then they tell me I can't smoke or drink for 24 hours. And it sucks, but I can do it. NOW I see I can't wear makeup? What? And, the other thing is I have fake nails. Big, long, fake acrylic nails fashioned to look "natural." I swear, if I have to take them off, somebody better reimburse me the $60 it's going to cost me to put them back on. And do I have to go without toenail polish, too? Because that's just crazy. That may just be pushing it too far.

4. I was invited to a Purse Party in two weeks, a party where some woman sets up about a billion fake designer purses, and all the women ogle them and buy some good knock offs. Which sounds awesome. But then I asked what the price range is, figuring on about $20. Because that's what you pay on Canal Street in New York City or the flea market if you're a good bargainer. The woman who invited me says, "Oh, they range from, like, $50 to $100." Fifty to a hundred? Are you kidding me? Is it just me, or does it seem ridiculous to be paying anything more than $30 for a good fake bag? I mean, yes, it's cheesy to carry a fake bag. But I'm guilty. And I'll admit it. And I can't rationalize paying $1,000 for a purse. So I love fake bags. But there's something deep inside of me that refuses to pay for a knock-off what I could pay for a nice real Guess purse or a real Coach at TJ Maxx. Am I wrong?

5. I need a new CD. I've been listening to The Fray for months now, and though it hasn't gotten old yet by any means, my vocal range isn't compatible with that of the lead singer. It's always too high or too low for me to sing along comfortably. So I need something new, preferably by a chick, with awesome lyrics, preferably of the Love or Broken Hearted variety, so that I can have little mini-concerts in on my 20 minute drive to and from work every day.

6. I'm a little embarrassed to admit it, but I really can't wait for the new Christina Aguilera CD to come out. But I will buy it when it does. Oh yeah. I said it.

7. Is it just me, or is everyone noticing how bloggers are slowly but surely starting to shut down their blogs either because they're over blogging or because they're going to blog for someone else? It makes me very sad, this trend. Especially this one. Because, even though she's blogging for VH1 now and she says she'll continue to update her blog, too, I know it's a lie. It's like the old "Let's just be friends, and see where it takes us" line in a breakup. You know it's not going to take us anywhere. They'll forget about you, and then you're just left, combing the archives for reminders of the way it used to be. You think I'm being dramatic? It happened here.

8. I also need some books to read while I'm laying around my house eating bon-bons for three days. I definitely want Augusten Burroughs' new one and this one by Laurie Notaro (and not just because we have the same first name...My friend Scott told me he couldn't stop laughing while he read it, and we both share an obscene, sometimes scary, love for David Sedaris. So I trust him.). But, really, those are the only two I can think of. I read five books in Belize. And I was drinking and actually doing other stuff, too. So I imagine that, if I'm not too doped up, I'm going to be reading a lot. Either that or watching a lot of porn. Ha! Kidding, mom! Maybe.

9. To anybody who read the now-removed grammar post, I'm sorry. That was pretty stupid.

10. In order to make up the time I'm going to be using for my trip to Mexico in August with Billy, I've been working every Saturday for the past two months. I will continue to work these days until my time has been dutifully made up. But now, I'll be taking three weekdays and a Saturday off for my surgery. At the rate I'm going, I will be working on Saturdays for the rest of my life.

11. But, my massage is on Sunday, at that pretty much makes up for it. The Spa called today to confirm, and asked for either "Laurie or William." It was sort of cute, the way they asked for either of us. It made me feel like a real couple. But, anyway, apparently, we have to be there early to "fill out paperwork," which I find a bit odd. I count on filling out paperwork at the doctor's office, but at a spa? It seems sort of silly. Shouldn't they just rub me all over and leave it at that?

12. I ordered something awesome for Billy for our year anniversary - A Ghana world cup jersey, with his favorite player's number and name on the back. At first, I was a little bummed because it was backordered until October. Now I find out that my order never went through, and the gift is now not available. I told him about it already (not only can I not keep a secret, but I thought since I know what I'm getting for our anniversary - the trip to Mexico - he should know, too.) and now I have to tell him to forget about it. Any suggestions for a new gift?

13. I downloaded and set as my ringer "Summertime" by DJ Jazzy Jeff and The Fresh Prince. I'm a little embarrassed every time it rings, but it makes me smile, too. It reminds me of junior high, walking home from school, the ice cream truck. I love it.

14. On a related note, DJ Jazzy Jeff will be DJing at a club about an hour from here in two weeks. My friend showed me the flyer and he goes "How much does that suck? Will Smith is making millioins of dollars per movie, and this guy is DJing at tiny venues. You think the Fresh Prince would've set him up with a gig in Philly or something." But I don't think Mr. Smith owes Mr. Jazzy Jeff anything. We argued about that for a while. But it all came down to the fact that we can't believe DJ Jazzy Jeff will be in Newburgh! Will he play and remix "Summertime?" "Parents Just Don't Understand?" "The Theme for the Fresh Prince of Bel Air?" In West Philadelphia born and raised, on the playground was where I spent most of my days... Ahh. That'd be incredible.

15. If I don't stop this now, I'm going to keep adding things to list until it's ridiculously long AND until the second I leave work. And there are things I should be doing; I should go and, you know, work.

Have a good weekend!

7 comments:

Tiffany said...

I have a couple of Lauire Notaro books I could send you (including that one) if you want... She's hysterical! And they're quick reads - perfect for your rehab.

Are you into girl groups with awesome harmony? Check out Antigone Rising. They have a website where I think you can sample some of their music. I discovered it last summer and it's by far my favorite sing along in the car CD.

Umm... that's it. The last several CD's I bought were all country otherwise!

portuguesa nova said...

I'm terribly scared of taking a chance on Laurie Notaro, even though I trust everyone who has ever loved her. Let me know how it goes. I just don't want to be disappointed.

I've been to one of those purse parties. Even though you know you should not be paying so much for fake stuff, you can't help but be sucked in...that said, if you happen to come across this one (preferably in green...not the messenger style, only the tote-diaper-bag-sized style), and you buy it, I will totally, 100% pay you back.

Cute diaper bags are really super hard to come by.

William and Laurie sounds like a very regal couple. Swanky. You'll have to name your children Landon and Beatrice.

anno said...

I'll also be interested in your take on Lauri Notaro. You might also like Meg Wolitzer's The Position.

The subject matter of The Dead Beat: Lost Souls, Lucky Stiffs, and the Perverse Pleasures of Obituaries may seem, um, well, perverse, but for character studies, it's pretty interesting.

Anonymous said...

yea, about that water you have been drinking.....there are 2.5 servings in each bottle, at 50 calories per serving, and 13g of sugar a serving,well, you do the math....you might as well be drinking Dr.P.....

The Editter said...

damn, I missed a grammar post! And yes, you do have to remove your toenailpolish too. But everything you have to give up pre-op makes the recovery extra good!

theotherbear said...

Don't you get paid sick days from work? I know folks in the US don't get free healthcare and that is bad enough (not that ours is free, it is a 1% tax on your earnings, or 2% if you earn over a set amount). And I know you don't always get the same deal on holidays as us (we get 4 weeks paid a year as standard). But it also sounds like you don't get paid sick days. That's bad.

Laurie said...

Otherbear, I do get paid sick days, BUT I just feel guilty...Because I took ten days off for Belize, and my 2nd vacation week comes at the end of the year, but my employer has been nice enough to ALSO let me take off another seven days for Mexico. So I feel like I should, you know, give something back for taking so much time off. (I'm a little jealous of your FOUR paid weeks a year...A LOT jealous, actually!) BUT, the bright side, my employer-paid-for health care is covering all of my medical expenses, leaving me without having to pay a dime for any of it.

Editter, your advice to remove my fabulous toenail polish makes me sad, but I love the your silver-lining of the recovery process. :)

Anonymous, yeah, I know...MOM!

Anno, I may have to check out that book too. I read its review on Amazon, and it looks intruiging. I'm always on the lookout for new, interesting reads.

PN, I'm scared of Laurie Notaro, too. But I'm just going to throw caution to the wind and take a chance. Hey, I'm getting my ovaries played with, I might as well take a risk with a new author while I'm at it. I'm CRAZY!!!! And I'll keep an eye out for that diaper bag. What do you want to bet they'll actually have it? Then I'll be forced to buy it for you!

Tiffany, I'm glad you've had good experiences with Ms. Notaro. I love that you offered to send them to me, but as it turns out, my awesome grandmother is getting them for me, in lieu of being here for my recovery (she lives in Kentucky). And feel free to suggest country singers. I'm an equal-opportunity music lover!